Scorn

As I look into the mirror,

Like trying to search through a crystal ball,

I wonder if this is what everyone sees,

As drops of crystalline water falls,

I wonder what they see,

The answer is so far,

That they say those hurtful things,

That my self-esteem they mar,

I close the windows to my soul,

Trying to keep out all light,

Maybe it won't hurt if I don't look,

So I keep them shut tight,

I then put my hands over my ears,

Trying to block sound out,

Maybe it won't hurt if I don't hear the words,

I wonder what it's all about,

But by now it's too late,

The blows have been wrought,

The feelings won't go away,

By my mind the memories are caught.

Lava Lamp

Transfixing, Transversing, Transpiring,

The imagination.

Intoxicating, Enlightening, Engaging,

The mind.

The wax bubbles float lazily,

Appearing so free,

Yet still trapped in their glass prison.

They captivate the eyes,

Captivate your thoughts,

Grabbing your awareness.

Metaphorically they represent our lives,

We believe we are free,

Yet we are trapped in our own prisons,

Drudging our lives away,

Just so we can live an existence,

That we don't have time to enjoy.

Goodbye Rexa

How do I put into words, what I feel?

How do I express my sorrow,

My pity,

My pain?

I mourn your passing,

I mourn your death,

Most of all I mourn your life.

You were unique and different, yet beautiful,

I pity the sorrows that befell you,

I pity the blows that you were dealt.

First, you were abandoned,

By the person who was supposed to love you,

Next you became blind,

And suffered through much pain.

But in the end I am thankful,

Thankful that your suffering came to an end,

And I truly hope you have found peace,

I hope you have found love,

And a painless existence,

Goodbye dear Rexa.

My Inspiration

My inspirations comes,

When it wants to,

After I'd been numb,

My ideas so few.

Hits like lightning,

Strikes me deaf,

It can be so frightening,

Above clouds I'm heft.

I ignore everyone,

Hear nothing at all,

Until I am done,

Once I've answered my call.

Change

I know change happens,

Happens all the time.

But I don't understand it,

I don't think I ever will.

I wish my life would stop changing,

Changing all the time.

Whether it is for good,

It ends up usually bad,

Major things happen,

Always for the worst.

It leaves me lonely,

And usually heart broken.

It may seem like a good thing,

To make me stronger.

But I really don't think so,

Just makes my sorrow deeper.

I find people that I love,

And loose them again.

It hurts to see them go,

Yet I can do nothing about it.

Beauty

Beauty is a thing of glory,

And if something be real beauty,

There are no words to describe it,

Like the beautiful feeling of love,

That feeling when you know,

Just know with all your heart,

That there is somebody,

Somebody out there for you,

And it is multiplied ten-fold,

When you meet the person,

That makes your day brighter,

With only a smile,

With only a look in their eyes,

And only a touch,

And you know with your soul,

That no one in the world,

Could take their place,

Ever.

No One

No one could take your place you know,

No one,

Nobody,

No one could make me feel more alive,

More wanted,

And loved,

Just by looking into your eyes I see,

That you also love me,

And I hope that I am right,

'Cause I know that without you,

I would die,

And wilt,

I would not want to live without you,

Without your love,

Without your loving touch,

And the kind heart,

Of which I know is inside,

So just please always remember,

I luv you.

William

Wonderful in so many ways,

Is always trying his best,

Lets so many step over him,

Loves unconditionally,

Incredible,

Always in my mind,

My love.

The Pedestal

There is one who was always above the rest,

Upon a heavenly pedestal,

Whom I thought was the best.

I never thought that I would get to touch,

The one I held so high,

As secrets these thoughts I held as such.

Then one wonderful day my dreams came true,

My secret love professed his feelings,

And said 'I love you'.

Now my life is lived in that dream,

Everday new wonders to behold,

Still astounded that, worthy I was deemed.

And although his life is just as awry,

With secrets of his own to hide,

Still upon that pedestal I hold him high.

Renor Xukuth

Hair of black ebony and obsidian,

Flowing across her white skin.

A beauty to behold,

Her heart used to cold,

For she was shunned by her kind,

Thought she would lose her mind,

Shunned for not being the same,

Shunned for not being tamed,

For her gifts were her bane,

With the black energy in her veins,

Able to see things that many fear,

The past, the future, and times near.

She left her home land,

With no other did she band,

For she stayed alone,

Killed many, and that past gone.

Now she knows one,

Let her past be done,

Only for her he cares,

And across her face, smiles dare.

Bitterness

Bitterness rest in many minds and souls,
Bitterness is caused by past pain that is hard to let go of,
And when you suffer from bitterness caused by hurt, no one understands,
My feelings are always scorned, so I havebecome bitter,
I cannot feel hurt by others, for I am ridiculed, so I have become bitter,
And when I have tried to get over this bitterness,
Let the past stay where it has happened,
Someone has to bring it back up, or sayhurtful things to remind me of why I am bitter,
I try not to be bitter, I try to live my life,
But I cannot do so if YOU won't let go of the past, continuing to make me suffer for my pain.

Loneliness

Have you ever felt that deep, profound loneliness,
Where it grasps you in its skeletal hands,
And refuses to loosen its cold fingers?
That deep aching sensation,
Where it feels as if your heart has been replaced,
By a gaping hole that sucks in all of you?
Mind-numbing pain,
As if there is no life?
Have you felt that darkness that threatens to creep over you,
Eroding at your sanity,
Digging you deeper and deeper into the prison of your mind?
And have you ever felt the relief that washes over you,
Like a spring rain when someone offers you a hand,
Pulling you from the depths of that loneliness?

Depression, Be Ye My Always Faithful Companion

Depression, be ye my always faithful companion,
When no others are there,
You can be found.

You are my shadow,
Only visible when light begins to shine,
Greedily taking my emotions.

Are you my friend?
You are the only constant,
Never changing.

Are you the only honest one,
With your whispers in my ear,
Even though what you say is dark?

Are you my enemy?
Trying to drag me down,
Into unknown shadowy depths.

Is all you imply lies,
Words meant to sadden me,
To keep me as your own?

I am not sure which is true,
If you are friend or foe,
What your intentions be.

For everytime I come close,
To believing you are lying to me,
Others prove the words that you speak.

Wallflower

A wall,
A person,
Seem to be one.

The person unseen,
Only the wall behind them,
Seems to exist.

Passed by,
They fade away,
Becoming one with the brick.

Tears go unseen,
Cries go unheard,
Feelings go unaffected.

Doubt on one's existence,
If they are worth anything,
Begin to surface.

Who are they?
Just a Wallflower,
With a voice unheard.